Somewhere With Regret

Okay.

I feel I should start by saying that this is NOT a fitness-oriented blog by any stretch of the imagination. The next few weeks involve a lot of running so that’s where my mind is focused at the moment but rest assured, this blog will be as A.D.D. as always. I named it “Josh Across the Universe” because that’s what it is. My journey, my adventure, all of it.

Working on who I am physically is a big part of that.

That said.

I have decided that 2017 will be a weightless year.

What do I mean by that?

This morning I weighed myself for the first and last time of 2017.

When it comes to fitness, working out and all that other nonsense we put a lot of focus on weight loss and sometimes nothing else.

This past year was a literal roller coaster when it came to my weight. I logged in at 196.4 pounds at the beginning of the year and came in at 193.3 this morning.

From my progress chart on My Fitness Pal you can see I was on a solid decline for the beginning of the year and then went a little bonkers. From May to August I had a series of surgeries on my leg that prevented me from being as active as I usually was during the year. This led to a spike in my weight.

Add in issues surrounding depression and anxiety and I really lost all desire to do anything positive for myself, including sticking to proper nutrition and exercise. My weight became cause for further depression and I found myself giving up.

As we neared the end of 2016 I stopped hopping on the scale despite working to get my act back together. When I finally did I wasn’t happy with the number. I had been so close to my weight goal only to end up so far away from it again.

Then something interesting happened. I wanted to throw together a “Transformation Tuesday” post for Instagram and used a picture of myself before my first marathon last January and a candid shot from a recent photo shoot.

When I put the two together I was surprised to see that, despite gaining weight, I looked better than I had started the year.

In all the focus on my weight, I forgot to take into account the non-scale victories that come from diet and exercise. Physically, I’m doing a lot better than I had started the year. I’ve gone from a 36 waist pant to 34. Even 34 is starting to be too big for me. I’ve noticed weight loss in my face (which is where I want to see it leave the most… that and my chest).

All these little things mean so much more to me than a number on the scale.

So with that in mind, I stepped on the scale this morning for that weigh in. When I leave for work in a few hours, I’ll be stopping by the dumpster and throwing my scale in it.

2017 will be about non-scale victories. Obviously if something medical comes up, I won’t refuse to be weighed, but I’m going to make sure that I don’t let a number define my self-worth anymore.

The next step is having a plan in place, which I do! My next two weeks are dedicated to running with the Dopey Challenge followed almost immediately by the Rebel Challenge out at Disneyland. Once I return from that trip I’ll be rotating through some different programs which I’ll be writing more on later.

So I guess that’s my resolution for the year?

I’m not a proponent of the “New Year, New Me” attitude because I think it’s a ridiculous notion. New Year, Improved Me. I’m all about that.